once i thought my innocense was gone, now I know that happiness goes on

Heard of The Janice Dickinson Modelling Agency? The one who wrote Everything About Me Is Fake...And I am Perfect, a judge in US next top model show, appeared on numerous fashion magazines.. and right now.. opening her own modelling agency and her own reality show!


Channel [V] is airing a special marathon screening of the complete 1^st season of “Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency” on Saturday, 26^th May at 6:30pm and Sunday, 27^th May at 1:30pm... don't Miss it!

***

Only 1 week away from ending my uni life.. leaving school has never been so emotional before.. But nothing eventful this week, just savouring whatever I'm used to do in uni (the everyday things), and hanging out with my dear friends.. sounds like doomsday haha (I believe that in 9120 years, the human race will extinct). The only notable thing that is worth mentioning is that, I stole 2 nangkas from the park nearby. haha..

Recently, after all these years, I learned more about myself after encountering many experiences.. some good some bad, but I'm gonna share it since my coursemates and friends seems to be so into creating tests about themselves to test their friends to know how much they know about them. But I didn't score well in any of the tests, so I'll make it a point to tell you all about the things that may not seem so obvious to all of YOUs.. hehe, instead of you guessing what or how I am really like..

After going through a few interviews, I find out that I may have slight ADD, where everytime my interviewer says something, I can't seem to pay full attention! I don't know why, but I still have eye contact with that person, but at the same time, although I may seem like I'm looking at him while he's talking, I'm more like looking at the window outside and day dreaming.. Gotta stop this.. Because of that, I seem to cock because I wasn't paying attention.

From that, I also realized that I am not a good cocker, despite the fact that in this industry, you need to be able to talk cock.

I don't draw as much as I did last year, and I realize I no longer draw on exam question papers anymore, although I still draw on school tables.

I am an avid pen spinner and I spin with style. haha. If you don't already know, if I have a pen or pencil in my hand, it'll be spinned, and I have already broken and spoiled many many many pens and pencils. My skills: Thumbaround and Sonic

I tend to lose my stationeries every time since standard 1 and can't seem to change or be more careful. This I really can't understand.

I believe that every part of my body can contribute to the nature, like peeling of your skin and feed it to the ants.

I love drawing very very much but just as a form of entertainment for me, not a profession in the future. Just like what my friend said to me "Kalau saya minat menyapu sampah, takkan lain kali nak kerja penyapu sampah professional?" which is indeed very true.

I am super bitter but I just don't show.

I love watches, I'd love to collect watches one day, I love to read about complications of watches.

I hated bittergourd but I love bittergourd.

Hard to sleep without my pillow.

I literally experienced hell after watching Event Horizon, when visions of hell and a figure literally appeared when I'm alone at home, particularly in my sister's room, the darkest room in my house. For 1 fucking week. I fucking hate horror movies since then.

I used to cover my head with my pillow or blind fold myself with a small tower so that I wont see any ghosts when I was sleeping.

I believe I have OCD, although realizing it I do it all the time (this isn't funny), I walk and check if a gate is unlocked for several times, I check repeatedly if the tap is not turned tightly, I check if the TV isn't turned off although it is turned off, I check if the car lock is locked repeatedly.

I guess these are the things that if you don't live with you'd probably won't know, or if you do, you may not take the time to realize.. cos many people don't.

Me and my vegetable obsession

In case all of YOUs are wondering..

For those of you who often question me about Straightedge (sXe), or make fun of it, or wondering why I put the letters "sXe" at the end of my Yahoo ID, I shall explain them now. Honestly, I don't appreciate the jokes made about my principles, thank you.

This will be the trivial part, where I'll explain about the origins and what it is really all about. Straight edge is a clean living youth movement that emerged from the punk rock subculture in the early 1980s. Its basic tenets promote a drug-free, tobacco-free, and sexually responsible lifestyle-tenets that, on the surface, seem counter to those typical of teenage rebellion. For many straight-edge kids, however, being clean and sober was (and still is) the ultimate expression of resistance-resistance to the consumerist and self-indulgent ethos that defines mainstream U.S. culture.

Just for your information, Straightedge is purely philosophical and not a teaching or religion. It is mainly, abstinence from substance abuse. My habit of being vegetarian has nothing to do with straightedge and although the subculture has evolved into practicing vegetarianism in some followers. My reason of wanting to be a vegetarian is purely due to health reasons (I have high uric Acid). I do take meat as my source of protein (seldom or during outings or when I am with my parents), but I prefer to have vegetable more often than not (By definition, I am a Lacto-Ov0-vegetarian, where I do consume eggs and Dairy during my vegetarian meal days.) I hold strongly to my principle of maintaing my food consumption so even by invitation, I may decline offers by friends. I am trying hard not to be a hypocrite :).

'Straight edge' philosophy is fundamentally one of abstinence from a few things which 'the world' professes to find important, but which may actually be hindrances rather than necessities. Its basic principles were outlined in the lyrics below, written by the forefathers of the philosophy, the punk band Minor Threat.

(I) Don't smoke,
Don't drink,
Don't f**k¹,
At least I can f**king think

Can't keep up
Can't keep up
Can't keep up

Out of step with the world.

- 'Out of Step (With the World)', Minor Threat

The straight edge ideals of Minor Threat, and fellow straight edge bands such as Gorilla Biscuits and State of Alert, promoted freedom of thought and the motivation to rebel against the crowd if what the crowd isn't all it's cracked up to be. Some people make these ideals out to be stringent 'anti-fun', but there are no actual rules. The lifestyle is entirely down to the discretion of those who choose it. Ian MacKaye became so agitated with people's misinterpretation of 'Out Of Step' as a list of rules, that Minor Threat re-released it with the words 'this is no set of rules, I'm not telling you what to say or do...' spoken during an instrumental section. It should also be noted that people who make out Minor Threat and associates to have been 'anti-fun' were probably part of the 'crowd' in the first place.

The Relevance of Straight Edge Today

Ignoring its unfortunate extremes, the original premise behind the straight edge lifestyle is still inspirational today. Peer pressure to fit in with The Crowd today is just as strong as - if not stronger than - it was in the 1980s. Many teenagers do what they think is 'cool' to become or stay popular without considering the long-term effects of their choices - smoking, for example, is very common among teenagers.

It is likely that straight edgers will 'lose the edge' when they are adult - after all, there is nothing inherently wrong with drinking. But hopefully, by this time some of the pressures of youth will have been lifted, and they will have built up enough confidence to say 'no, this is not how I want to live' when they are put in potentially excessive or compromising situations.

Straight edge offers teenagers an opportunity to break out of the destructive cycle of peer-directed sensibility, and enables them to realise that they have the ability to control their lives and a responsibility to look out for those around them. The ideals of the philosophy have been partly tainted by the narrow-mindedness of a few individuals, but the ideals themselves are still viable.

For, me my principles do not lie in the limitations of Straightedge, because there are certain things that I adhere to, such as being hygienic, always believe and love Malaysia in every way, and many other believes that not only me, but my ancestors have been practicing.

上を向いて歩こう 涙がこぼれないように (Look up while you're walking, So your tears won't fall)

For a very long time, My close friends and I have planned a trip to Ipoh but it only realise last week. Anyway I'm glad we made it there. It was my first time in Ipoh and I really like it there. As a Malaysian, probably you'd say, "ahh.. boring la go terengganu or kelantan".. but believe me, after visiting those states, I totally changed my POV about states in Malaysia.

Anyway, Ipoh was damn fun, and clean. Food is cheap, and really nice. There are nice places to visit, to yam cha. I guess Ipoh is a good as Melaka, just that sometimes, I'm a little bored with Melaka. Sooo, we planned a 4 days stay in Ipoh, and our friend Chee Wai, was realllly kind to offer us a place to stay, plus thong sui (desserts) every night haha. I'd say, Ipoh is a place where you can easily get comfortable with.

First Day, Thurs: We stopped along the highway to the rest area, in Tapah, where Chee Wai and Weng Leong had some food in the KFC which smelt like rubber. hehe,.. then we reached Ipoh about 6. We prepared and had dinner in the famous Ipoh Hor Fun, shop in town. Unfortunately, at that time, the camera wasn't functioning to well, so there were no pictures taken. After that, we went to a cafe called ICE ICE BABY.. the name sounds terribly funny but the place was really nice.. here's some pictures to share.

Yue Yun and Chee Wai with the drinks.

Yue Yun and Me

Yue Yun

Me, Yang and Yue Yun being who we are.

Me with my dessert

All of Us. (Some how I can't remember who took the photo for us).

Me and Yue Yun at the front part of the cafe

The Desserts

Chee Wai and his Dessert

Homa and the very delicious dessert

Just putting it up cos I think I damn gaya in this pic.. haha

We came home around 2-3 I guess, and then rest till 9.30 and soon after left to explore Gua Tempurung (which I mistakenly called Gua Musang). Oh Let me reming you that there are many wandering spirits around Gua Tempurung, particularly, around the place that I peed at. I understand the belief that, if you wish to piss or shit around some forest area, you should chant are pay respect before you do so. I did what I should do, but I guess with less conviction, because I was more worried if a snake bit my wiener. As soon as I peed I fell onto a big rock and hurt my back and my neck. Some ghosts are really nasty, they make you pay more than you did. Anyway along the trail in the cave, I accidentally hurt myself a little bit, but it is nothing compared to when I fell down on the rock. It was really adventurous, and if your a little careless, you might hurt urself badly. Anyway I really felt like a champion la.. cos there wasn't anything as adventurous as this in my life :D.

How we looked like after getting ourselves wet.

Flexing, (the next thing to own: Kinabalu!) haha.

At the begining of the journey

After that tiring journey, we went home, to wash up and rest. I ASSURE YOU, that limstone caves just like Gua Tempurung, smells like BO. Seriously. After wahsing up and rest, we went for lunch at an old shop, where everyone had asam laksa, but I wasn't too fond of Asam Laksa so I had 3 toasts, because I wasn't that hungry.

After that we headed off to Kellie's Castle, which was nice but sadly, not very very well maintained. Here's some pic.

Kellie's Castle was believed to be haunted.
But we looked more like happy than scAred..

Us at the front of the Castle.

At one part of the building

"The photo"

At one of the mysterious corridors. Kellie's soul is believed to be wondering around the area.

At the top of the building.

At a balcony, that looks really dangerous.

That night, we spent eating seafood, then we headed off to Kinta City shopping centre, the place where we saw a lala chai playing dance dance revolution until got breakdance all wei.. I'd rather see a kid play the fishing game.. haha the dance thing was way too lala for me to handle. Then we went minum for awhile and then went for sight seeing around the old train station

Yue yun at the train station

In an old school lift, but in this pic, you can't really see how old school it is.

Me posing posing sikit.

Them posing posing sikit

Homa posing posing sikit

and then headed home to sleep. On Saturday we woke up late in the morning and went for breakfast in a Dim Sum shop.

Then we headed to a temple that I don't know what its called in English. There's a cave inside the temple, and another temple, inside the cave.

I don't know about the others, but I really think this horse looks very gross.
I dunno but.. Yucks.. It has totally nothing to do with Yue Yun.

A view from the cave.

Our impersonation of the characters in Journey to the West.
Homa said Ah Yang has no choice but to be Zhu Bajie (inside joke).

The hidden temple.

Oh Yeah its called Ling Sen Tong haha

Us again. opposite us there's a small pond full of all kinds of bored tortois.
They are so bored they can't be bothered by the food thrown to them by visitors.
A bit poor thing la. haha.

At night we went to a club called Time Zone but the DJ played lousy music, I didn't drink plus he played bad music, so it wasn't connected at all. On Sunday, we woke up about noon and had breakfast and then off to buy some stuff and headed home. We had old town coffee before we left and salted chicken. Because it was a long journey, me, homa, and yang decided to take turns to drive home. Chee Wai was too tired so we decided that he should sleep, Yue Yun was not reliable enough (hahaha). Unfortunately, god wanted me to save Yue Yun's life. Because of me, she got away without stomachache. Here is the discussion:

It was agreed that everything we ate that day or the night before were the same things. Therefore, if i were to have stomach ache the others would have it too, furthermore, I had less of deep fried food compared to the others. We had the same amount of salted chicken so that can't be the cause. BUT, when we ordered our coffees, I called white coffee GAO and yue yun ordered White Coffee. Not being a coffee drinker, I decided to exchange my drinks with her cos I can't handle such a heavy one. Not long after my stomach felt pain, and have to stop at the Tapah Rest area to shit. Yue Yun owes me one.

Anyway, this trip has been really great, in fact one of the greatest. We;ve had lotss of fun and memorable moments. I think its pretty much like a last trip together before we graduate and move on. But I really hope that there will be more trips to come when we start working next time, together.

***

The day after, on Monday, I have an interview in Genting, for the position of Management Trainee. At first I worried about transportation, because I don't have a car, but luckily, Lai was also called to attend the interview. So after a few arrangements we went there together.

It was an assessment center, where there are a few sets of course works that you have to complete in order to be selected as an employee. There are few stages and some requires you to perform individually and a few in groups. I guess I didn't really do well on the individual presentation part, and I think maybe I will no be getting the job.

Many people told me that they wouldn't want to work in Genting because of the location. Nevertheless, I'm already used to living in a confined and secluded area, like Cyberjaya. Therefore, the idea of working in Genting will be fine by me, plus, I really like cold weather.
The benefits are really good, cos you have free accomodation, a minimum starting salary of RM1800, and monthly food allowance of RM1000. So it kinda got into me that I really want this job.

The assessment centre was quite draggy, where the time wasn't punctual and we the candidates had to wait a long period of time for our presentations. The whole programme took us about 5 hours to complete. You can imagine, Lai and I started our journey in Cyberjaya at 11 and only manage to make it home at 9, due to some wrong turns and stopping to have our dinner in Murni. We couldn't understand how we ended up in Damansara, but since we were there we might as well eat there haha.

As soon as I reached home, I checked my email and me and Lai both of us were shortlisted for the BAT assessment center. I heard it is going to be reallllly difficult. And compared to Lai, I'm gonna be the one who's not gonna be selected. haha.
Here's a photo for remembrance during the Assessment Center.

I was a little overdressed but I just want to create a good impression la. haha, and our concept newspaper tower called, the genting Tower (after impromptu naming)

***

A short conversation between two friends:

Ken: What kind of dogs does your father breed?
Jerm: Son of a bitch.

-n-