Merdeka!

My first few days of work have been great because of all these people... who have helped me and helped me to go through the hard times during work... And not to mention, some of these few people have already left the company... hehehe

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Since the past one year, up till now, i have been thinking. Thinking about my future in love. When I think about love it all always lead to MONEY.. Thats how I think, or that's how people in my life made me think. Money has never came to me as something easy, I did not get what my friends got. And I fucking bitter cos of money. I sometimes think, apart from friends and family, money comes after other people, cos I'll be seen in the same way, vice versa.

The same goes to love, perhaps I've grown matured because now I think about money instead of love. I'd rather not break someone's heart now because I know love is not only about love. Its about giving and taking. What giving and taking means that ideally, you would want to have the same amount of give and takes as your partner, and it always doesn't happen the way you want, which leaves the relationship getting uglier.

At times, I admit that I succumbed to infatuation, but a crush is just a crush, money is thicker than that damn infatuation. Thinking about the trouble of getting into a relationship gets me all worked up and sick... Sometimes, I'm lost, whether I would get married or not, when will I ever be financially independent? Will I be richer than you, you and you? I started small, but I wanna end up big. I wanna be the best among everyone that I know, I can't be lower, thats how I see myself.. All thinking big, all thinking about earthly desires. Honestly, I am a bastard, only relating to god when I'm in trouble, a true bastard in this pathetic world.

But if there's anything I wanna do, love (getting into a relationship) comes second, after money. I've been thinking, the only person who can qualify to be my spouse must be a person, whose personality is as perfect as my mother, who would treat my future son the way she has treated me, in which I only have sweet memories as to how she has brought me up and never before have I ever have anything that I remember I am unhappy about what my mother did to me before.

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Oh and by the way happy merdeka to all malaysians. I am very glad that I come from malaysia, and to call Melaka my home. If anyone of you malaysians, would complain about malaysia, fuck you. (Anything you could complain about are the weather, and people who do not know how to throw rubbish in the designated areas... other than that, Malaysia is already a perfect place for all of us.)

Prologue

Ohh.. its been a really really really really long time since i've done anything to this blog.. right now at this very moment.. i can only think of updating in the cyber cafe because the current place that I am staying in does not have an internet connection... I've only started working last 3 days and these 3 days have been great, fun and tiring.. and at some point boring (training)... See... im working in a marketing research firm... so although im not incharged in the operations and production department (those who does data collection and sorting) I have to be somehow exposed to them so this morning and tmr I'll be going for fieldwork... which is,... tedious..

Well finally my days of slacking in mlk has ended.. And im pretty sure my parents are glad... and I'm glad too.. but staying so far away from family and friends have made me feel very lonely and bored when I'm at home.. its just sad.. I'm already missing home, my buddies, most of all my mom and dad, and my pillow (my sister doesnt allow me to bring it if im to continue staying in her house..) im also loving my working life.. my colleagues, the environment, and the endless food that can be found in the office.. haha.. I miss badminton sessions in mlk... and i miss working out.. in centrepoint, the gym for one session is like RM25... the most expensive gym in mlk would cost me 5 bucks.. haha.. im looking for a hardcore gym (don't matter if there's no air con) but it must be near to bandar utama..

Work has been fun because..

1. Everyone treats everyone well,.. from senior manager to manager to exec, all are close to each other because our cubicles are close to each other regardless of the position
2. All sorts of food and drinks around (because of the nature of the business, we have many client's products)
3. Everyone reaches office late and leaves on time
4. We do stay back in office, all the guys in particular.. to play LAN games.. haha... We played CS and starcraft and my direct manager is a damn good CS and starcraft player..
5. I'm given a laptop

Well staying in Bandar utama...

1. Is ok cos for at least im close to my sister
2. Not so good cos Im lonely..
3. Is good cos my sister tanggung some of my expenses..
4. Is not so good cos i really really really really miss my family and friends in mlk (not to forget my pillow).
5. No cheap gyms! Arghhh... Stopped working out for 4 days it felt terrible!